https://youtu.be/9qqvO7o32qI
He
sat on the solitary blue wooden bench overlooking the beach. The paint was
faded, chipping away to uncover the bare, raw natural tan. He sat there, just
staring out into the ocean, watching the foamy tide swish back and forth. It
was a sunny day, but the air felt brisk and still as the dusk was approaching
its end. There were no families playing in the sand, and no birds singing their
songs. Nothing but abandoned branches and seashells and the repetitive sound of
the crashing wave accompanying his loneliness.
He
did what he would’ve done somewhere else or in the comfort of his own
apartment, and that was think of her. He thought about her sarcastic jokes and
her Californian colloquialisms. He thought about the valuable moments of their
relationship, all of the staple memories that defined the kind of love they had. Yet the uneasy discussion of separation crept back in the cracks
of his memory. He didn’t want their relationship to end, but he understood the
reasons for her leaving, and he too didn’t have the capacity to continue the
relationship himself. With his need to chase the wild drunken nights and his family’s
apprehensiveness of her cultural background, he did not know how to balance all
of it. Perhaps he should’ve known it would have most likely fail since he was after all a young white man from Tennessee and she was a Californian Asian-American young lady. They came from different cultures, and sometimes that was well known. Whether it was his religious upbringing, or her agnostic views. Still, in the end he knew that he missed her, he missed all of her.
As
the night was approaching, he finally left the bench and started his journey
home. As he drove by the plaza filled with boutiques and charming bistros, he
passed by the ice cream store that they went to on their first date. He could
never taste tart cherries and creamy vanilla the same way ever again. He needed
a distraction to keep him from his misery, so he turned on the radio. He left
it on the oldies station. As he was beginning to feel comforted by the familiar
music, the haunting strum of the surf rock guitar riff came on. It was “Surfer
Girl” by the Beach Boys, and he swore he felt his heart stopped the second it
came on. This song always reminded him of her, probably because of the
romanticizing tone it possessed, but also because she loved listening to it so
much. He could’ve changed the station or turned it off altogether, but he couldn’t.
It was too beautiful to push away.
Moments
later, he finally reached his apartment complex. He parked his car in his
designated spot, and started to make his way to his place. He decided to walk
the four flight of stairs up to his floor instead of using the elevator. He ran
up the first set of stairs, and then ran up the second with a faster pace. As
he was turning the corner to the third flight of stairs, he notices a moving
figure with long black hair ahead of him. He felt his breath leave his body,
and wondered if this woman in a black hoodie and black jeans was his ex-lover.
He ran up the stairs trying to catch up to her. As she was reaching the top of
the fourth staircase, he was starting to feel his sweat roll down his forehead.
He was getting close to her back. The woman could hear him behind her so she
turned around. When she turned to face him, he saw the familiar dark brown eyes
stare back at him but it was not the woman he loved. He suddenly felt
heartbroken.
“Um.
Can I help you?” The woman asked nervously.
“Sorry
I didn’t mean to scare you, I’m just in a hurry to get home.”
“Oh…
That’s alright. I guess I was moving pretty slow, I hope I wasn’t in your way.”
He
gave a slight smile and said, “No it’s alright, you didn’t do anything wrong.”
He
told the woman to have a good night and went on his way, running faster to reach his door. He walked into his
dark apartment, and turned the living room light on. He looked around and
noticed how quiet it was. He went over to his navy blue couch and slumped into
the left seat. He stared up into the ceiling and wondered if she thought about
him too.
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